He's a hunter and has 3 hunting dogs that he keeps outdoors at all times. He believes 100% that all pets should remain outdoors and lives in a very cold area. We haven't had the complete conversation yet but he's let me know that he doesn't appreciate pet hair in the house. He's dated a lot of women since his last divorce (12 yrs ago, he's 50, I'm 45) and has finally found someone to marry (me). I come from an unhappy 17 yr marriage and really do want to marry him. I know that if he loves me that he should accept my pets too. We need to sit down and resolve this but what should I do if he's unable to bend on this one ?
Fiance' believe that all pets should remain outdoors. I have an older indoor dog %26amp; cat. He's not flexing.
My pets come as a packaged deal.
And if a man can't accept that, then he's not the one for me.
My cats are mostly indoor cats, so there's no way in hell I'm putting them out in the cold for some hairy, sweaty man.
Fiance' believe that all pets should remain outdoors. I have an older indoor dog %26amp; cat. He's not flexing.
Bring the pets inside and move him outside!!! A pet needs food, love and to be warm just like humans.
Fiance' believe that all pets should remain outdoors. I have an older indoor dog %26amp; cat. He's not flexing.
If he doesn't want to bend, he doesn't love you as much as you think. My husband never had pets before, but knew that I loved pets. We have 3 indoor pets because he wanted me to be happy. If he doesn't bend, don't move forward in the relationship because he doesn't love you unconditionally.
Fiance' believe that all pets should remain outdoors. I have an older indoor dog %26amp; cat. He's not flexing.
If you can't negotiate a fair deal for the pets, you can not negotiate a marriage. You either find homes for your pets, (I wouldn't) or realize that he is not very fair or flexible. If you want to enter into another unhappy marriage, go for it and give up what is important to you.
Fiance' believe that all pets should remain outdoors. I have an older indoor dog %26amp; cat. He's not flexing.
Then the question is if you are willing to bend. I personally think that your cat will not survive outside if it is older and has been an indoor animal. Having pets myself, there is no way I would let anybody force me to put my pets outside. They are like children to me. I love their companionship and will not bend on that for anybody.
I also agree with whereRyou above me.
Fiance' believe that all pets should remain outdoors. I have an older indoor dog %26amp; cat. He's not flexing.
Maybe find someone who will allow pets in the house.
Fiance' believe that all pets should remain outdoors. I have an older indoor dog %26amp; cat. He's not flexing.
ok--i'm not a huge fan of pet hair either. but as a indoor/outdoor cat owner, i've learned to get over it. it's tough to blend households--when my husband %26amp; i got married i was 40, he was 45 and we've had some issues but have worked through them. your husband needs to respect your feelings on this one too. i personally am somewhat OCD about my house being neat--but i've learned to just relax--it's only pet hair, is it really the end of the world? your fiance needs to compromise--that's huge when it comes to marriage.
Fiance' believe that all pets should remain outdoors. I have an older indoor dog %26amp; cat. He's not flexing.
Will you be living in his house or yours? Don't you see a red flag here? If he's that unwilling to compromise about this what's he going to be like on really important stuff? I'd use this situation as a reason to take a very close look at your relationship. I too love my "now" husband but I sure wish I'd have heeded those warning signs before I married him. There's a lot of conflict that could have been avoided had I not ignored those Red Flags. Be true to YOU first!
Fiance' believe that all pets should remain outdoors. I have an older indoor dog %26amp; cat. He's not flexing.
you should keep in mind that if neighbors see pets outside in cold conditions 24/7 they are perfectly within their rights to call animal control who will remove the pets from the house (i've physically seen it happen!).
don't bend just because "you've finally found someone to marry" you. you stick to your guns on what you think is right. if you're animals are used to being inside, they won't adjust to being outside 24/7. and can you stand it when you're animals are whimpering at the door because they want to come in? animals are living creatures who need care and attention and deserve a safe environment. hunting dogs are not the same as all other breeds and he will need to understand.
best of luck!
Fiance' believe that all pets should remain outdoors. I have an older indoor dog %26amp; cat. He's not flexing.
Would he listen to a vet (being that the vet's a professional and all)? Take your intended along for the animal's next vet appointment and maybe the vet can convince him that older pets should stay indoors.
If possible, negotiate rooms of the house that your pets "can" be in. Maybe your fiance will relent if the pets aren't in the bedroom and remain in the kitchen at night. (i know, that's hard with a cat %26gt;^..^%26lt;).
Maybe you can promise and activate some procedures to minimize his fears of dirt and animal hair - brush your cat and dog daily, keep the dog's fur short, etc. My sis wipes her dog's feet when he comes in from outdoors. Maybe you could do that and it would decrease the amount of dirt in the house.
If he's not agreeable to negotiating you may want to think about your relationship. Maybe that's why he's dated alot of women and never settled down with any - he's unwilling to compromise on anything, even if it means alot to his partner.
I got married later in life too. I have two cats. My husband isn't really nuts about cats. One time the one cat was sick but I knew I shouldn't take him to the vet because of the expense and I would have lost time from work. My husband actually took the cat to the vet because I had to work (my husband was "on the bench" which is "idle at the moment" in software consultant lingo, it doesn't mean unemployed!), my husband said about the cat "I know how much he means to you." Thanks for reminding me of that. One of my friends asked my husband why he married me when I had so much baggage (the cats). My husband said "Her cooking skills outweighed her baggage."
Now that's compromise. My husband came from a culture where pets are not common nor treated like members of the family.
Fiance' believe that all pets should remain outdoors. I have an older indoor dog %26amp; cat. He's not flexing.
if he is unable to bend and this is an issue for you...he may not be the man to marry
Fiance' believe that all pets should remain outdoors. I have an older indoor dog %26amp; cat. He's not flexing.
Tell him to take a hike!!!!! If he is not flexible on this he will probably be the same whenever you disagree on anything else. Do you WANT to be a doormat? You cannot expect an older dog and cat to suddenly adapt to being evicted from their warm cosy house to a life outside in all weathers. You should not even CONSIDER it. If you give in, then take the dog and cat to a re-homing centre. To do anything else would be cruel. Good luck if you DO marry that man, you will need it!
Fiance' believe that all pets should remain outdoors. I have an older indoor dog %26amp; cat. He's not flexing.
I have always made sure that the guy I'm with understands that I am an animal lover, will always have pets and they will always live in the house.
Fiance' believe that all pets should remain outdoors. I have an older indoor dog %26amp; cat. He's not flexing.
He has to understand that it will be both your home and not just his and if your pets have been indoor pets they cannot be expected to be kept outside...they will not be able to handle that! You shouldn't have to bow to his wishes on this...it would be a big mistake and you will resent him for it. If he will not bend on this issue after talking with him you will have to ask yourself if you can marry him and either get rid of your pets or keep them outside and feel horrible about it.
Fiance' believe that all pets should remain outdoors. I have an older indoor dog %26amp; cat. He's not flexing.
Maybe he finally found a woman who'd sacrifice her beloved pets for him - the previous ones wouldn't.
Why does HE get to call the shots here, especially regarding helpless pets??? This is scary to me.
Fiance' believe that all pets should remain outdoors. I have an older indoor dog %26amp; cat. He's not flexing.
ask him this question and let him think about it .
if they were your children would he still want them out of the house.
i don't know about you but I'm 58 and have a dog and 3 cats and they are just like kids they do some of the things a child does. they also give and except so much love.and if some one else can not accept that than you don't need them.
Fiance' believe that all pets should remain outdoors. I have an older indoor dog %26amp; cat. He's not flexing.
I agree with him,animals do NOT belong indoors.
To say that he doesn`t love you enough because he won`t let you have an indoor pet is childish,foolish,selfish and immature of YOU,grow up!
Fiance' believe that all pets should remain outdoors. I have an older indoor dog %26amp; cat. He's not flexing.
If you feel you must marry this man then before you do find a good loving home for your pets. A place where they will be able to remain indoor pets and be loved and cared for. A place where they won't be tossed outside because someone wants to get married.
Fiance' believe that all pets should remain outdoors. I have an older indoor dog %26amp; cat. He's not flexing.
Good for him.
The line has been drawn in the sand.
Fiance' believe that all pets should remain outdoors. I have an older indoor dog %26amp; cat. He's not flexing.
I know someone who listened to her "hunter" husband and left the dog outside. The poor animal froze to death one winter night. These pets have been indoors pets - they will not make it. It is not fair - honey - if you let him win this one you will be very sorry. If you are afraid of another unhappy marriage - you need to think twice about this guy.
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